9 Months Later...and Christmas Prayers

Wow!!!

Here we are, NINE months later. Nine months ago, I thought we would lose her. I didn't have any faith she would find her way...now, we find ourselves excited for Christmas for the first time in YEARS.

In 9 months, Addi's life is nothing short of a miracle.

In 9 months, she got clean; got happy; started college again; became the most excellent mommy; learned to love herself again; became a good sister again; loves to read again; GOT BAPTIZED; helped me with my addiction work; spoke to Celebrate Recovery; and today, got accepted back into the university she started in 2008. She has been so blessed! God has shown her grace like only he can do. To say that I am amazed, would be an understatement. I'm blown away. I'm in awe. I'm grateful. I am humbled. We are blessed beyond belief. Thank you all for your love, support, encouragement and prayers.

Last week, we had the Addiction Crisis Town Hall Meeting. It was a great success. It was aired live on KSN TV and the panel of experts were fantastic. Other than the people writing into KSN's Facebook page, about their irritation of cutting into the airing of the Rockefeller Christmas Tree, we had nothing but positive feedback. During the Town Hall, we had a speaker by the name of Stacy Krokroskia, who spoke about the loss of her son Jordan. Her emotions are still raw, 4 years later. Her pain cut through my heart like a knife. She was so brave to stand up there and speak about her loss. She said something that I have thought about many times since she spoke. She said "If I saw myself on TV, I would think "Oh, that poor family"--- not realizing that poor family could be mine and would be mine. Addiction CAN touch any family."  She is so right. It can and it does. I think at the town hall, that we effectively showed that it can strike any family of any dynamics. I hope that viewers listened with an open mind and have taken to heart that they too, could be Stacy Krokroskia standing there. They too could lose their child. I hope some young people listening, realized that they could be Jordan Krokroskia--an athletic, smart, beautiful, normal boy---he had goals and dreams and family and friends...and because of drugs...he is gone. Ugh, it breaks my heart.

 I often times feel so guilty that my daughter is still alive. I would not trade her for anything in the world--but find myself asking, "Why us, God? Why did you spare her life, rather than their son's or daughters?" I talk quite often, to the parents of the young people on our posters and billboards. I feel I have a special bond with them in some way, just from getting to know them through creating these posters and learning about their son's and daughter's. The holidays are a very difficult time for them. Some of them, this will be there very first Christmas without their son or daughter. Heart wrenching. For some it has been longer--but the hole in their hearts is still there. Even through their pain or grief, EVERY single one of them roots for Addi and sends me notes of encouragement. None of them wish their pain on anyone. They are grateful because our family hasn't suffered the immeasurable loss that they have. THAT is why this drug campaign is so important to all of us. I don't want anyone else to go through what our family has, so I am candid, honest and sometimes too blunt. These families who have lost their son's and daughter's don't want to see anyone else lose their child to this horrible addiction...so they speak, they share pictures, they suffer through the pain of seeing their kids on a billboard---to help you! Isn't that the most amazing gift? Please think of them when you are driving down the road and see those beautiful faces on billboards, or posters in schools. Say a prayer for them this holiday season as there is an empty chair in their home.

Thank you to everyone who has worked so hard with me on drug awareness this year. Thank you to the Alliance of Southwest Missouri; KSN; the local schools; and all the parents who stepped up to help.

Thank you to Ms. Addison, who found light in the darkest of dark and is making our Christmas one of the most special for our family.