There is no "Magic Cure"

During the course of my daughter’s treatment, we have run into the same problems many families endure, regarding medical care and health insurance. Fortunately, my husband has excellent insurance for behavioral health, but it took 3 relapses and dancing through hoops to finally get her into an extended treatment facility.

If an addict has health insurance available, sometimes they will only pay for a couple of weeks, sometimes they will pay for the magic number of “28 days”. In this short period of time, an addict is supposed to be detoxed, sometimes with medication, and then adjust to life, learn coping skills and go back into the world after 28 short days. I would have to guess the success rate is very low. Unfortunately, a family is unaware of the non-success stories and has false hopes that they will be magically cured.  If and when the addict relapses, it is almost as painful to the family as the first time they became aware their loved one is an addict.   Upon dismissal, all facilities will express a need for the addict to regularly attend meetings and “change their playground and playmates.” That seems easy, right? Wrong.

Once they are released into the world, they are exposed to all types of triggers, such as smells, people, everyday items that they used for drug use, such as spoons, Q-tips, cotton balls, straws, needles (also called “darts”) and other items that the average person sees every day, without noticing. These everyday items can cause an addict to crave their drug of choice. If they fail to attend self-help groups, such as AA or NA, then they likely have not found a sponsor to talk them off of the proverbial cliff. Next thing you know, they have disappeared back into a crowded world of unknown people and “here you go again”.

Another issue we had with treatment facilities was medication.  Sadly, addiction is a booming business.  I knew nothing about treatment facilities until I searched for a place to send my daughter. I ran into brick wall after brick wall. It seemed that most places that I would have preferred, had a waiting list of 2-3 weeks. Other facilities didn’t accept people with health insurance and worked solely off of public grants. Other places believe in treatment with medication. The idea of medicating an addict is extremely frustrating to me. Not just once, but twice, we have had to send my daughter back to treatment for detoxification of medications she was prescribed BY HER TREATMENT FACILITY. I am sure there are some addicts that truly benefit from medications to block opiates, however, my daughter, and a majority of the other addicts I have met, have all become dependent on the very drugs that are supposed to assist them.  I have bitched, battled and complained greatly to medical providers over this very issue. Our family doctor has always been aware of her problems, so he never gave her narcotics. I guess in my mind, I hoped that all medical physicians would take the same precautions---but that is not the case. A parent or loved one of an addict must have good communication with the treatment center, or chances are, your addict will be released on medication and incurring costs to the tune of hundreds of dollars a month to continue their “methadone or suboxone treatment regimen.”  Both drugs supposedly cause the brain to think its already receiving opiates, therefore, they won’t crave more.  Both drugs cause similar physical signs as opiates, such as pinpoint pupils, moodiness and sleep issues. I, personally, hate both drugs. In my life, they have done nothing positive for my family. For those of you who have success with those, that's great. They just have not worked for my family.

Another issue in the drug treatment business is the mixture of patients that are there both voluntarily and involuntarily. Often times, if someone is forced to go to treatment by either their family or the Court, they do not take it seriously and are just buying time to get back out into the world. By intermingling the two types of patients, it can cause negative influences, more temptations and yet another friendship based on addiction that will likely lead to relapse. It is the hope that every person in treatment truly wants help, but that is not always the case. It would be nice if every family in America could afford to send their family member to a private facility that had their own counselor and the one on one time they need, but it is not possible. An addict must truly want to get better and be committed to that goal if it is going to work.  The addict must make a conscious decision to avoid the people who are not conducive to their treatment. I’ve seen people succeed in court ordered treatment, but it can only occur if they come to the realization that they are truly powerless over their addiction. In talking with recovering addicts who have participated in the court ordered drug court monitoring programs, they seem to have a better recovery rate than those who are just ordered to treatment for a certain amount of time. I'm not certain how co-mingling the patients could ever be avoided because all patients make a claim to seek sobriety. They all know the key words they need to say, to expedite their discharge and they are all people, all addicts and all deserve treatment. Court ordered or not, their addiction is no less important than my child's.

Finding a treatment center is an exhausting task. It takes hours on the phone, only to be told that they cannot talk to you and must talk to your addict. Once you have made contact with a hotline number, you end up having multiple phone calls from facilities attempting to gain your business.  Each facility has their good and bad points and good and bad counselors. A family must find the place that meets their needs both spiritually and financially.

The last time I visited my daughter, I couldn't help but notice that there were a ton of people in line for visiting day.  My son and I discussed the increase in visitors and in patients. I looked around the room and mentally noted a man in a Titlelist hat; a grandmotherly looking lady; a teenager; a very pretty girl in her 20’s; an athletic looking guy; a man with no teeth; a man with perfect teeth; a lady who was dressed to the nines and a lady who was wearing tattered clothing. As I sat there “people watching”, all I could think of, was the slogan “Addiction does not discriminate.” It truly does not. I saw people from every walk of life, all fighting the same battle. All in the same place and all with hopefully the same goal. All addicts.

If you are searching for a treatment center, I would encourage you to ask questions regarding their follow up care; their view on medication (such as Methadone or Suboxone therapy), the policies regarding interaction of patients and their religious affiliations. Those are all important issues that you will face. What may work for my child, may not work for yours and vice versa. Obviously, the cost and insurance coverage is the number one factor in determining which facility your loved one can be treated. There are some great facilities in the United States, but a family should ask questions, read reviews on the Internet and research the physicians who will be treating your loved one before jumping onto the first facility that says the magic words, “We have a bed available.” With a little bit of research, you can find out most anything. Don’t be scared to ask questions. You are the customer. They are the salesman. You are not at their mercy. Also, ensure your loved one signs a release to discuss their treatment with you. Otherwise, you could find yourself footing a bill for unknown treatment and being left in the dark.

Treatment should be a positive step in an addict’s life and in the life of their loved ones. No one, however, is “magically cured” and treatment is a lifelong commitment. A family should have a positive attitude and be supportive of their loved ones decision to enter treatment. Family support is very important in the addict’s success rate---however, as much as a family wants sobriety for a loved one, they cannot achieve it for them. It requires full commitment from the addict. With the help of a good treatment center, recovery is made a bit easier for both the addict and their family. To a mom, those 28 days can provide a good night’s sleep that hasn’t occurred in years. To an addict, those 28 days might not be enough, but there are extended programs out there---you just have to find them.

Ask questions, research and be optimistic but realistic. There is no magic cure.